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cheating, i know

i know it’s cheating, but here’s another great thing i got via email through the magic known as the internets.

here it is–“some things to do before the inaugural”, presented unedited.

Some things to Do Before the Inaugural:
1. Get that abortion you’ve always wanted.
2. Drink a nice clean glass of water.
3. Cash your social security check.
4. See a doctor of your own choosing.
5. Spend quality time with your draft age child/grandchild.
6. Visit Syria, or any foreign country for that matter.
7. Get that gas mask you’ve been putting off buying.
8. Hoard gasoline.
9. Borrow books from library before they’re banned – Constitutional law books, Catcher in the Rye, Harry Potter, Tropic of Cancer, etc.
10. If you have an idea for an art piece involving a crucifix – do it now.
11. Come out – then go back in – HURRY!
12. Jam in all the Alzheimer’s stem cell research you can.
13. Stay out late before ! the curfews start.
14. Go see Bruce Springsteen before he has his “accident”.
15. Go see Mount Rushmore before the Reagan addition.
16. Use the phrase – “you can’t do that – this is America”.
17. If you’re white – marry a black person, if you’re black – marry a white person.
18. Take a walk in Yosemite, without being hit by a snowmobile or a base-jumper.
19. Enroll your kid in an accelerated art or music class.
20. Start your school day without a prayer.
21. Pass on the secrets of evolution to future generations.
22. Learn French.
23. Take a factory tour anywhere in the US.
24. Try to take photographs of animals on the endangered species list.
25. Visit Florida before the polar ice caps melt.
26. Visit Nevada before it becomes radioactive.
27. Visit Alaska before “The Big Spill”.
28. Visit Massachusetts while it is still a State.


  1. Cathy

    Hi, this is one of the web pages my prof hooked our class up to as part of an assignment to make webpages. I am curious so I thought I would check it out. The list of the 20 things to do before the inaug. was sent to me before and though I laughed, I also have to cry to think that we may be loosing a lot of our freedoms. How the American people could vote this man back into office is a crime. I’m glad you have the courage to be out there. More power to you!! From Cathy who is over 50 :blush:

    Posted on 01-Dec-04 at 9:34 pm | Permalink
  2. hi cathy,

    thanks so much for your kind words. if there’s anything i can do to help you with your assignment, please let me know–i used to be a teacher, and so that statement comes as a reflex.

    this reminds me of a story. when i was in eighth grade art class, my teacher didn’t pay any attention to me, mainly because i had no easily discernable artistic talent. but one day, he looked at what i was doing and asked if he could use my work as an example for the class. i said yes, and was so excited as he stood up in front of the class with my piece.

    until he started speaking, and i realized that he was using my work as an example of how not to do the assignment.

    if this is the case with your class, please let me know, as i will be most amused and very psyched that my life has looped back in such a marvelous way.

    : )


    Posted on 03-Dec-04 at 12:31 pm | Permalink

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