jamie lawrence-howard • highly absorbent redundant and superfluous verbiage • clogging tubes since 9.1.98
it’s amazing what moving a little furniture will do for your outlook.
i’ve always complained that our apartment, which is nice-sized with a huge kitchen by relatively inexpensive one bedroom manhattan apartment standards, nevertheless feels crowded and cluttered.
who knew that making the room smaller would solve the problem?
Continue reading “nice new surroundings”
today i’m going to eat at rutt’s hut, which i saw on a tv show about hot dogs and is, coincidentally, in clifton, nj which is mere miles from my boss’s house, so she is taking me, and her husband and young daughter are going as well. and kirk too.
the hot dogs are deep fried. i’m hoping that there are other deep fried items as well…maybe a snickers bar. that would be optimal.
Continue reading “hutt of rutt”
this whole scotus thing is going to be anticlimactic.
even though i knew all along that this guy was going to be approved, or voted in or on, or whatever, i still held out some hope for a few fireworks to entertain me in the interim. but everyone, or enough-one, is falling all over themselves to give approval, either direct or tacit.
and the only people who are getting het up are the people with a vested interest in interest-bearing investments of fundraising dollars that they want to pad.
only one thing is going to be of interest to me in this whole process.
Continue reading “as i suspected”
well, i guess i need to weigh in on the whole supreme court thing, even though no one really knows much about this guy, and even though if i tell you what i really think, which i will, you’ll probably be aghast.
scotus, by the way, is (s)upreme (c)ourt (o)f (t)he (u)nited (s)tates, not to be confused with potus, who is my stuffed monkey, at least he is until all the cats die and we get a new cat which will be named potus if i have any say in matters. then we will have not potus but poti.
anyway, the shocking thing is that i don’t give a good goddamn if this guy is confirmed or not, and i kind of hope he is confirmed. and here’s why, and then you can be aghast and tell me i’m ignorant and deluded and uncaring and illogical and whatnot.
Continue reading “scotus”
i like the gothamist.com site–it’s a nice compendium of nyc stuff, even if the “royal we” point of view (“gothamist is tired of all this crap, etc.”) gets annoying.
today they had a story on charlie and the chocolate factory that was basically a rant about how people can’t behave in the movies anymore.
and a site that usually gets a few comments per story got 67 comments for this one within, like, 5 minutes. so i figured i’d rant about this too, and see what happens.
Continue reading “cheap ploy for attention”
ok, so i’ve been derelict. and don’t expect much the first day back. there’s no special reason i haven’t blogged. just didn’t do it. i tend to get interested in things, get very enthusiastic, and then tire of them. usually permanently.
Continue reading “wtf is this?”
i really don’t brag too often. i have a lot of reticence when it comes to “tooting my own horn”, so to speak.
but today is an exception, because i won the ncaa basketball tournament office pool.
and with it, $264 in cold hard cash, baby.
whooooooooweeeeee.
Continue reading “jamie floats to top of pool”
dnr. do not resuscitate.
i have my living will in place, and so does kirk. and if you don’t, you should have one.
it’s more complicated than that if you are gay and in a relationship, though. for instance, kirk and i won’t go to ohio, virginia, or any of the other states that passed anti-gay-marriage laws last november. why won’t we go, you ask?
Continue reading “dnr me”
sounds like an assignment i’d have given my seventh grade english class. yes i taught seventh grade english once. it was hell. an old friend of mine, everett caudle, used to say that kids should stay home during seventh and eighth grades and return to school when they’d gone through puberty and their hormones had somewhat leveled off.
boy was he right.
anyway, my favorite current tv show until last night was “desperate housewives.” but not any more.
Continue reading “my favorite tv show”
i want a mac.
again.
hopefully, the karma fairy will read this and drop a chunk of change in my pocket. my computer, which is a pc, a dell, is several years old. 5+ years old, to be exact. i think.
and it does the job, but i’m dreaming, and while i’m dreaming, i’m drooling. right on the keyboard, every time i go to the apple site, which is more often than i should.
Continue reading “i want a mac”
i just upgraded the software used to run this site (greymatter) to the latest release. please leave comments if you see any errors, but so far it looks pretty airtight.
and for the techy geeks in the house–trackback crap and extra geegaws nothwithstanding, greymatter is still my favorite blogging software. email me and debate me if you disagree.
and by the way…
Continue reading “new software version”
celebrate easter–kill a peep
photo of kirk’s easter pie courtesy of andrew
last night on the subway there was a probably homeless guy panhandling. there’s a lot more of that lately…it always goes up in the wintertime but this year it seems more than usual.
and this guy looked rougher than most. if i have change i sometimes give it to them, sometimes i don’t. don’t tell me they’ll just drink it away. most don’t and so what if they do? what, only rich people can have substance abuse problems? it’s his damn life, and if i want give money for food at the risk that it might not go for food, then it’s my damn life too. in this case, i’ll err on the side of life, as terri schiavo’s parents are so fond of saying.
anyway, i didn’t have change so i didn’t give him anything. but the guy standing next to me looked right at him, and in this louder than necessary voice says “there’s a better way, brother. you need to find jesus.”
and i stood there, wondering, as i honestly sometimes do, “what would jesus do?”
Continue reading “a better way”
i’m gonna be lazy and repost this email i got today. after yesterday’s schiavo-thon post, i think i deserve that.
remember abbott and costello? of course you don’t. well, probably you don’t. their “who’s on first” routine is classic comedy at its best.
here’s the updated version, featuring my favorite president. to bash.
Continue reading “who to hu”
ok, it was a cheap shot.
yes i used that poor vegetable woman to get you to read something i really care about, grammar. but be honest. if i had entitled yesterday’s blog “my grammar nitpicks” you would have blown by it at top speed. great thoughts, or to be honest slightly better than mediocre thoughts, left unread. this will not do.
hence the subterfuge. it’s all about packaging.
so, in the interest of karmic balance or whatever, here’s what i think about terri schiavo.
Continue reading “‘fessin’ up”
well everyone else on the damn internet has weighed in on this, so why not me? my brief note at the end of yesterday’s blog notwithstanding.
i’m glad i waited to write this, because i have a bit more perspective now than if i had blogged about this, say, over the weekend, when, as one of my beloved former students used to say, “fire shot out of my ass.”
or “was shooting”. but that’s not the phrase she used.
Continue reading “terri schiavo”
i used to be vegetarian. hell, i was even a vegan for, like, five years or something. i protested on behalf of the animals for peta, lived my life as an example, gave away my entire leather shoe collection (including the most awesome collection of customized doc martens and goth boots from london that you can imagine), did all the “right” things.
now? i cook more and more meat at home, even though i hypocritically say quite often that i don’t really cook much meat at home.
this weekend, i won a meat tray. and damn was i excited.
Continue reading “the meat tray”
lil’ kim’s conviction caused me to rethink yesterday’s rules, and so, i give to you,
the rap clause: file this as a subpoint to the rule of famous. famous rappers are the exception to the fame rule–they are always convicted. why? ain’t it obvious? it’s a racial thing. there may be times, maybe most times, maybe nearly all times, when rappers are guilty, but i’ll bet that innocent rappers have nevertheless been convicted.
p diddy/puff daddy you say? not a rapper. please.
this, by the way, is an ideal blog entry to gizzogle.
now i’m off to eat lots of birthday pennsylvania dutch excess with the in-laws (and of course the hubby as well.) with apologies to dorothy parker, here’s my take:
oh life is a glorious cycle of food
a medley of extemporanea
discussing your next meal whilst eating’s not rude
and i am marie of roumania
cheers all–happy weekend!
so, with the recent spate of criminal judgments against rich and famous people, i’ve sensed a pattern and can conclusively say that guilt or innocence in the american justice system comes down to one thing.
perception.
and if you think about it, there are apparently hard and fast rules to govern your fate in this system. i’ve thought and thought, and i think these formulas work pretty well. what do you think?
Continue reading “justice in america”
boy, have i been. i know it. it’s not that i don’t want to blog. it’s just that i don’t want to.
Continue reading “derelict in my duty”